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How To Be A Peaceful Parent
by Tiffany Washko
How does one become a peaceful parent? How does one bear the trials of the day and yet be peaceful when accosted by a toddler or a teen vying for your attention?
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Samantha is worried. Her boss has clearly told her that she needs to mend her ways if she wishes to continue in the company. She knows it's not her fault. Single motherhood and late night baby tantrums are taking their toll on her. Suddenly her 2-year old toddler who demands her attention interrupts her reverie and she gets frustrated. She spanks her and screams, "It's all your fault!"
Scenes like these are not at all uncommon in today's world. The stresses and strains of our daily lives coupled with a heavy sense of our responsibilities take their toll on our behaviour and attitude towards our family and children. This behaviour affects our children and they end up being aggressive and violent. And then we wonder, "Where did I go wrong?" These days the high cost of living demands that both parents work to meet the requirements of the entire family. However, they tend to get tired and are unable to attend to their children who clamour for their attention. If you are one of them, then you need to understand that even if you give your child all the riches of the world, those will not matter so much as a peaceful, loving and non-violent upbringing.
How does one become a peaceful parent? How does one bear the trials of the day and yet be peaceful when accosted by a toddler or a teen vying for your attention? It is possible. Here are some ways and principles that can help you:
• If you have had a tiring day, it's not your child's fault. Hence, you cannot vent your frustration on the child. If you feel angry, distract yourself. If you are feeling tired, freshen up!
• If you do something wrong due to your own problems then it's not your child's fault. You can't blame everything on someone who has done nothing. Most of the times parents blame their child to transfer their guilt on to them. Don't do that. It will kill your child's self-confidence and self-esteem.
• Try getting up early or adjusting your routine to your kid's routine. If you get up early, you will have more time to accomplish tasks and hence will be more relaxed.
• Take care of yourself by exercising and eating right. We as parents forget that we are also individuals who need some time off to take care of ourselves. Take help from friends or relatives. Do something good for yourself like meditation and exercise.
• Remember children love doing the opposite of what you say when they are stressed out. Hence, deal with your child in a calm manner so that he does your bidding.
• When you react, you lose control and when you lose control; your kid gets the control. So be calm and focused.
• Listen to some music. Some relaxing music playing in the house relaxes every one.
• There are times you need to discipline your child. Shouting, cajoling and getting angry do not work with them. You need to be quiet and firm.
Becoming a peaceful parent is easy if you know what you need to do. Remember, you are the one who needs to control the situation in a quiet dignified way.
